17/08/2016
I was having some problems to write on the other web page, so I created a new one and problem solved. I have been sharing with you some things I have been doing that I consider important. Did you know that there are people who never eat a piece of fruit? Some others hate vegetables... and this is very serious! So, I am trying to "tempt" you, so you can eat fruit (as ice-creams, for instance).
Spending time in nature is also important, hence the photos I shared...
We change people's lives and I really hope I can change yours, positively! Speaking about ice-creams... I found a very interesting recipe, but still have to make some changes... then, as usual, will share with you. And then perhaps you can have a funny day in your friends'/ family's company and surprise them with a "lovely" chocolate popsicle... Tell them to guess what the popsicle is made of and they will never guess...
. Okay, that was mean (sorry), but it would be fun. Remember, people never forget how we make them feel
.
Honestly, I prefer to eat chocolate simple (tablet
) and ice-creams made of fruit, but this recipe is "original" (it has oats).
I already decided what I will do to present my old friend: A peach pie! Or perhaps 2?!
But as the birthday of a friend of mine is first, will try to cheer him up, because I am "feeling" that he is quite down... unfortunately. Regarding to the last birthday... I am still thinking; yet, I can almost be sure that it is better to not say anything and stay like this "smiley" 
.
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Behind each body there is a person; a human being with a unique story! Bodies aren't perfect; mine isn't, yours isn't... nobody can achieve perfection. Currently, everybody seems to care a lot about the physical appearance; now, one thing I can assure you: the most important is the inside!
Once a friend was telling me how "Kim Kardashian" is "attractive" (full of curves, he said). I told him:" the best curve in someone's body is their smile. Of course was labelled as "intellectual"...
My dearest friend, when people smile is because they are happy... and when they are happy, they don't care whether they have cellulite, wrinkles, stretch marks or whatever... The truth is that when people love us, they love us for who we are, not because of the body we have! And love makes people happy, so, why should they bother with superficialities, huh?!
I appreciate all those brave people who have the guts to show their body (I could never do that). They fought against the "society" and against themselves and now are able to show people they won the battle... of acceptance. They are happy and so am I to see them happy. 
They aren't less beautiful...
http://greatist.com/live/women-share-vulnerable-stories-while-posing-in-lingerie?utm_source=Sailthru&utm_medium=email&utm_content=story2_image&utm_campaign=daily_newsletter_2016-08-17_mails_daily_new_header
"Every body is beautiful and every freckle, hair, blemish, scar, and wrinkle is a trophy to be proud of! " —Carolyn Uphill"
Just loved this statement (even if I am not proud of mine).
Not even psychology helps me... http://www.2knowmyself.com/relationship_breakups/psychology_of_falling_in_love
Now, one thing that helps me is to sleep. I don't even bother you...
How was your day? Today I felt strange... strangely happy and don't even know why (it was a weird feeling)... Whatever... Time to have nice dreams... Good night and sweet dreams. Sleep tight!
"See you" tomorrow,
C.
P.S. Just read some "old" emails... It's unbelievably incredible how someone's words can mean so much when mine (or me) mean zero. Even after so long... Have you ever felt as if you knew someone for ages when you, actually, barely know them?! If so, congratulations... join me!
18/08/2016
Sometimes I miss what I have never had; other times, I cry because lost the little I had...
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Have you ever felt that everything made sense, despite of being no sense?
Some people don't believe words have energy; the sender's energy! I can only say one thing or perhaps two... they (words) can show you someone's soul by the power they have of touching yours! Seems madness, I know, but it isn't. And when you feel this connection, an amazing feeling of peace arises... and no one can take it from you!
Have to sleep...
The less I think, the better!
The less I know, the better!
The less I feel, the better!
The more I sleep, the better, 'cause I won't be thinking or feeling anything...
The more I think, the less I know or understand...
The more I feel, the worse I end up.
What a paradox; I am not even sure there is a paradox here...
What the hell!
Time to go, (if they allow me to sleep...)
Good night and beautiful dreams. So I hope the same for me...
Just a question: Do you think people feel when you miss them? A good question...
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Today I am thinking about destiny and the conclusion is quite "interesting". Some call it fate, others luck, some others might call it karma... I call it destiny. Why? You might be asking. Because it's the course that life takes, which will eventually lead us there: to our destiny. So, when I say destiny, all the other definitions are already included.
I have heard quite often people saying that "Destiny does not exist; I make my own destiny!" It seems that these people have everything "under control", like if they had a kind of power to convert stones into gold or something. But I am trying to convert "the stones into gold" for "centuries" and I've failed completely. So, what's the difference between them and me? Am I doing something wrong or what?
Comparisons aside, I often see myself analysing things... and it's all quite "interesting". Weirdly interesting... pathetically interesting... an utter conspiracy! Almost madness!
(...)
_____________...
Reading this which truly touched me http://greatist.com/live/amy-schumer-gets-candid-about-an-abusive-relationship-in-new-book?utm_source=Sailthru&utm_medium=email&utm_content=story5_cta&utm_campaign=daily_newsletter_2016-08-18_mails_daily_new_header, look what I found:
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I Was In An Emotionally Abusive Relationship, And I Didn't Realize It
Just because there was no bruises, doesn't mean there wasn't pain.
Unfortunately, emotional abusive relationships are becoming more and more common in today's society. With movies like "Suicide Squad" romanticizing emotional abusive relationships, abuse is becoming a much more prevalent part of relationships. Even more frightening is the fact where it can reach a point that you do not even recognize that it is abuse. I know this because I was in an emotionally and mentally abusive relationship, and I did not even realize it.
Obviously, every couple fights. We all make mistakes and we get angry. This is just a part of life and being human. However, when a fight turns into completely bashing your significant other or putting them down -- that's when it turns into something much bigger and the relationship turns sour.
Healthyplace.com defines emotional abuse as "any act including confinement, isolation, verbal assault, humiliation, intimidation, infantilization or any other treatment which may diminish the sense of identity, dignity and self-worth." They list signs of this as "yelling, swearing, name calling or insults, mocking, threats, intimidation, ignoring, excluding, isolating, humiliation, denial of the abuse and blaming of the victim."
Personally, my relationship consisted of many of these signs, but I was in complete denial about them. We were so off and on that I could not keep track of when we were together and when we were not, in fact, it got to the point where he claims that we were never actually together. He used me for when it was convenient to him and when he wanted me. Any other time, he just threw things back into my face. Many of my friends told me I deserved better, but he got so into my head that I did not believe so. It got to the point where I did not think I deserved to be treated any better.
Looking back, I cannot help but to get sick to my stomach about the way that he treated me. It was not until one of my really good friends was blunt with me and said that he was emotionally abusive. At first, I was in complete denial about it -- saying to myself, "Well, I deserve the things he says to me. I was wrong and I need to take the blame." Granted, our relationship had a lot of bumps, I was at fault for some of them -- but so was he.
If someone loves you, and truly cares about you, they will not make you feel like trash. I cannot count the amount of times that I cried over him because of the things he would say to me. He made me feel like I was nothing but someone to hookup with. The saddest part of all this, is the fact that I let this go on for so long. I was young and I wanted to be loved. And I really thought that what we had was love. I truly believed in every fiber of my being that I was in love with him. But what we had was not love. I thought these issues were just normal things every couple dealt with. It was not. My relationship was not normal and in no means OK. No woman or man for that matter, should have to feel the way that I did, like I was just an object. He made my self confidence shatter and my insecurities sky-rocket.
When we parted ways for college, the relationship ended -- and it was honestly the best thing that I have done for myself. The last thing he said to me was, "Don't hook up with a lot of guys at college because I want to get back with you again over Christmas break, but I'll still hook up with a lot of girls." Just like that, it was done. With these hurtful words lingering in my mind as I packed up my things and headed to Santa Barbara, I was still so heartbroken.
The first few months was rough, I constantly wished that he was with me and I found myself wondering about him more often than not. This is when I looked back at the relationship and realized that it was in fact a very emotionally abusive relationship. It has taken a lot of time and evaluation, but luckily I have learned from it and I have become a better person because of it. Because of this, I now know my self-worth and exactly what I deserve and don't deserve in a relationship, or even in life for that matter. Don't get me wrong, it still very much effects me, and I still think about it, but I have learned to become a better person because of it. I decided that I owed it to myself to take all of the abuse and make something positive from it.
#MaybeHeDoesntHitYou is a movement on Twitter with thousands and thousands of people voicing their experiences about emotional abuse. As a society, we really need to become more aware of the fact that this is a real issue. Let's face it, this is in no way OK. My biggest advice to anyone going through this is to leave him (or her). It is going to be hard, I know, but don't let this go on for any longer. You are better than this. You don't deserve this. You might think you love them, but this is not love. You will find real love one day. You deserve someone who will lift you up, instead of slamming you down and not make you feel this way.
If you are going through this and need help, then please text "go" to the Crisis Text Line at 741741. You are not alone.
https://www.theodysseyonline.com/was-in-emotionally-abusive-relationship-and-didnt-realize-it?ref=tw
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You know, this made me think... a lot! I have lost my whole life with people I shouldn't have met (yet, there are thousands of people in the same situation). My marriage was full of this shit (mostly):
"any act including confinement, isolation, verbal assault, humiliation, intimidation, infantilization or any other treatment which may diminish the sense of identity, dignity and self-worth." They list signs of this as "yelling, swearing, name calling or insults, mocking, threats, intimidation, ignoring, excluding, isolating, humiliation, denial of the abuse and blaming of the victim."
But, most of all, I found a "coincidence": Ignoring! I have always been ignored, when all I did and wanted was to see them well. I guess people are clever (not intelligent, though) and choose the "weakest links"... that kind of people who believe in something higher than shit!
Despite this, one thing I utterly agree: "If someone loves you, and truly cares about you, they will not make you feel like trash." I already knew this... but here I was thinking whether I should wish a happy birthday to someone who has been ignoring me... Now I have the answer... and have another answer too: no one ever cared! Great! Fantastic... Magnificent! It must be great to use people and make them feel as trash. I never tried, but who knows one day I become a real bitch, huh?! I am done for today, literally! This world is made of Shit. Sorry, I must say that I use this word a lot...
We can't be soft-hearted people... we just can't.
It's like people say: they have your email, address, phone number, etc. If they don't get in touch is not because they can't; is because they don't want! Come on, most of times they even know where you live and what car you drive...
I am overthinking too much...
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A happy ending...
http://greatist.com/live/i-was-told-i-may-never-walk-again-now-im-a-triathlete?utm_source=Sailthru&utm_medium=email&utm_content=story3_cta&utm_campaign=daily_newsletter_2016-08-18_mails_daily_new_header
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All this made me remember about a Woman's blog. She is Portuguese, but is living in the UK. Divorced and has two daughters. She wrote that her daughters don't watch the Disney cartoons... those beautiful stories I loved to see when I was a little girl... and when they do, she is always with them to "explain" how the world works. They don't need a man to save them and if someday they need to be saved, they have got me and their father, she said.
It's all or nothing... but I think I understand her... too much fantasy can kill us (I guess I watched too many "fairy tales")... but none also will. A life without dreams has no hope, no vitality! Then I remembered about the court... When I went there to get the divorce, a couple were there too. I suppose his income was high, because his ex only spoke about money... money and money (well, she wasn't a “nobody” like me)! An amount he didn't want to pay her... Their fight made me cry several times... only money! Children are like "things"... there are no families, no values, no love... just nothing. Now am beginning to understand why people call me surreal and utopian... when all I am is a stupid asshole.
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http://quotesgram.com/quotes-you-know-this/
http://www.jarofquotes.com/view.php?tag=learn%20to%20drink&page=11
After the paradox about knowledge... just want to wish you good night and wonderful dreams. Did you know there are people capable of communicating with someone telepathically, particularly those with whom they have a strong connection with? I know seems crazy, nevertheless I don't think it is...
Well, my time to go... my eyes want to close and see beautiful things; sleep tight.
https://pt.pinterest.com/brookelynoliver/quotes/
19/08/2016
More than ever and each day even more... 
http://mandymay21.tumblr.com
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I have a question... What can you take away from people when they already have nothing, huh? Will reflect about this... You know, once a woman told me something about this... and, in part, I think she was right. Her answer was: life.
Heartless people...
Will try to get some sleep... with a little bit of luck (that I never had). Good night, See you tomorrow,
C.
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Oh yeah, still waiting...
http://weheartit.com/entry/group/10093664
It's unbelievable how some people say easily goodbye and really mean it (and say other beautiful things and don't mean them at all). People are complicated...
https://pt.pinterest.com/explore/cousin-quotes/
It's how people think...
http://youqueen.com/life/100-quotes-about-life-that-will-inspire-you/
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I think my friend must be truly down as he didn't respond my email about his birthday.... I really wanted to cheer him up...
Made some chocolate decorations, but they "melted" as soon as I put them on the "birthday cake".... Just wanted to create something unique... (well, it is unique: the figures are melted). Perhaps I can share my "master piece"... but you are forbidden to laugh... do we have a deal?
Today is not my day, definetely not. Going to bed... I know I did the best I could, but it seems that it's never enough. Well, hope that my friend is well and has had a great day; hope that, tomorrow, my old friend will have a special day and like the surprise...
How was your day? Mine was so-so. Had some fun picking blackberries which I used to make a pie... but the rest of the day was... SO-SO!
Won't upset you with my problems anymore. Hope you have had a great day. Sleep well, sweet dreams,
C.
20/08/2016
Thought of the day: Why do we care so much about people who care so little about us?
* "So little", most of times means - NOTHING.
2nd thought of the day: we might speak the same language, but that doesn't mean you will understand me or I'll understand you. The interpretation may be different... it happens more often than you may think. Especially regarding to emotional part...
*I miss you,
*I love you,
*I need you, are just a sample of how people can distort their true meaning (and deceive) another.
Either you learn the language of the "world" or you will be a toy in someone's hands... But, you see, this "language" is not easy to learn...
If you have no intentions for a serious relationship (this is ridiculously stupid. Note that I added "Serious"... as the word "relationship" is so banalized) why do you play with someone's heart? Why to break them?
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Some advice... (that I should already have learnt)
https://pt.pinterest.com/pin/530721137307560293/
A woman or a man... the same for both!
https://pt.pinterest.com/pin/530721137307560293/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=450p7goxZqg (All of me...When we give all of ourselves, what's left of us? Perhaps nothing... perhaps not much... perhaps a shadow...!?)
I have a question... how do you classify my musical taste, huh?
Don't even answer, I was "teasing" you... sometimes I am impossible...
What's your favourite music/song?
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I guess I am a buddhist
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Alone, utterly, completely, absolutely. The worst isn't being alone, is being with people who make you feel like this... alone and like shit! People who shouldn't... ever! Enough of excuses...
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3rd thought of the day: I always thought that living a long life was a blessing... but people made me see things... lots of shit and bullshit... I would give my life in behalf of my childhood friend who died of cancer a few months ago. She had everything... everything that is worth to fight for... She was so alive, so happy, so beautiful in every possible way. If it wasn't "disrespectful" I could post a photo of her here... so you could believe me... She was such a great person... In fact, I would give my life to anyone, if it could make someone truly happy. All I would ask in return would be a smile... just one! Only one...
What a lovely day... what a great life...
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Why, when some people see another not so well, they make a point of making their life even more miserable?
Is it possible that people may be happy with someone's disgrace?! I am not... are you (happier)?
...
The sad conclusion is that despite not being happier, they are satisfied... yet, satisfaction has nothing to do with happiness, at least not in my vocabulary!
What a sick satisfaction, huh?
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Did you already watch the new movie of Steven Spielberg? I didn't, but watched the trailer... It seems quite a nice place to live, huh? At least for me...
About happy endings...
I swear to you, I always believed them; I always believed they were possible. Now, after all this time, am starting to think they don't exist; not for me! The thing is that I am not old, but I am older than I should. Too young to die... too old to restart.
Any good news you want to share with me? You can also tell me the bad ones, but I prefer the good news... please!
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4th thought of the day: without hope what else do we have?
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Nostalgia:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OOO4ROO_sPM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=naQ13ZwwcDo
Beautiful... her, her voice and the music... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kOB_yzC2f_A (a tiny part of my soul is healed)
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Another lesson I shall learn once for all...
https://pt.pinterest.com/x3leishalove/quotes-remember-what-you-deserve/
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5th thought of the day: Memories stay; people don't!
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It's something like that. During the night is easier; we sleep, so we don't think bullshit. Some say we become stronger day after day... but I can't agree. It isn't true...
I always say that if others can, I also can, so, if they can live without me, I have to live without them too or die trying...
My time to go... today was a day to forget! Tomorrow is another day,
Hope everything is okay with you,
Good night, sleep tight,
C.
https://pt.pinterest.com/pin/320318592222308465/
21/08/2016
Last year I had to beg a friend to go with me to a zoo. It may seem foolish, but I really wanted to give a special day to someone... so I begged him, a person I only knew by photo (but knew a lot about his life) and didn't even know me (physically) to make me company.
It's sad to be alone! So if you have someone, please cherish them. The most terrible poverty is loneliness... and I know what I am saying.
http://carlossalinaswriting.blogspot.pt/2015_07_01_archive.html
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♥♥♥
(From the web)
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We have to know where we want to go, otherwise is useless...
Always choose the path of love... for your own good! And there is no love without people... Put a little love in your heart and perhaps you may have luck. I hope you can,
Going to dream now, to forget all this for a while...
Sleep well, sweet dreams,
C.
https://pt.pinterest.com/sharmaamit/inspiring-short-stories/
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1st Thought of the day: it's not because you treat someone well, that they will treat you well.
(Throughout my lifetime all I've seen was the opposite and I am already included).
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I always believed in the family, for several reasons. One thing you can be sure, without people (we care about and care about us) we have nothing. But sometimes with a family you aren't much better than all by yourself. I think that's why so many people prefer to live alone... The thing is that the concepts have a different meaning to each one of us... though, my friends, family will always be a synonym of love and union. Not bed, not power. Call me old-fashioned; call me retrograde.
There is no love or union for the most of us!
When things are going well, everything is just great. But then the years go by... bodies change; diseases appear... all kinds of problems arise. Nobody likes problems and few are those who fight to get rid of them (as a family). The weakest link "breaks" and the game of power begins, through those who are "stronger".
I thought I had a family; I really thought I was important to them as they were important to me. Once someone said "we are what we think", but we can't live in our mind; we have to live in the real world and what we think is different to reality. I don't believe in Karma; good people are suffering, where is Karma or Dharma? Okay, probably in other lives people were or will be happy... I don't know, I just can't prove anything.
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How is your day going? Mine will be long... today the hours do not pass. Will share the "spoiled" masterpiece I made to my friend's birthday. You are forbidden to laugh... I am warning you!
I hope she had a happy day...
Hey, when is your birthday? It already went or is it coming? It would be ironic and an interesting coincidence if it is today... If so, happy birthday! https://cris1208.comunidades.net/new-years-eve (the second photo)
If not, can you tell me? How do you usually spend your birthday? Tell me everything, please.
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Ironically, to do our best might mean to do our "worst" to another... it's all a matter of perspective...
https://pt.pinterest.com/explore/staying-positive/
Something I spend hours thinking about...
How can it be possible to remember someone who does not remember us? Why does this happen? I mean, it's a curse to remember them all the time... We stop living...
Have to sleep, today was to forget. Do you want to know something "funny"? Generally people sleep to rest; I sleep to forget! I awake worse than before I sleep.
Wish you a good night and wonderful dreams,
Sleep tight,
C.
http://themindsjournal.com/tag/positive/
22/08/2016
1st thought of the day: We must accept the fact that we are replaceable... Which leads me to think how insignificant we are. I don't see people as "objects", but am realizing that the society does so.
With me or without me, what difference does it make? There will be "another me" somewhere, ready to replace me... but, I don't even have a twin...?!
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*18/08/2016 Today I am thinking about destiny and the conclusion is quite "interesting". Some call it fate, others luck, some others might call it karma... I call it destiny. Why? You might be asking. Because it's the course that life takes, which will eventually lead us there: to our destiny. So, when I say destiny, all the other definitions are already included.
I have heard quite often people saying that "Destiny does not exist; I make my own destiny!" It seems that these people have everything "under control", like if they had a kind of power to convert stones into gold or something. But I am trying to convert "the stones into gold" for "centuries" and I've failed completely. So, what's the difference between them and me? Am I doing something wrong or what?
Comparisons aside, I often see myself analysing things... and it's all quite "interesting". Weirdly interesting... pathetically interesting... an utter conspiracy! Almost madness!
.........
Today is a good day to speak about destiny. So let me write a few words about it...
Imagine your life as a labyrinth... Have you ever been in a labyrinth? You have dozens/hundreds of paths but just one is the way out, right%3
