26/05/2016

“Hurt people, hurt people”, have you ever heard this old saying before? Psychology tries to “justify” this behaviour by saying that those who have been emotionally damaged have a propensity to inflict their hurt and pain on other people. It makes sense, don’t you think?

I always believed that “Good people deserve our love. The bad people need it” (Mother Teresa), which also is one in the same. It all makes perfect sense; now let’s jump to the real world. Why the ones we love most, hurt us the most? Shouldn’t love change them? Shouldn’t love be enough? Why isn’t it enough, can you answer me?

It has nothing to do with have been emotionally hurt, because one way or another, we all were (are?) damaged and not everybody hurts people. I always thought that love could soften people, I mean, their hearts; as if it were a kind of special magic and with it we could heal the world. In fact, and ironically, I still believe in its power; I just stopped believing people. The paradox is that love without people does not work... 

It’s like as if you wanted to make a cake without any kind of flour... It will be a cream or a pudding, but will never be a soft cake. I don’t know if you like to cook; despite of this little detail, love is a little bit like cooking. The ingredients join together; sometimes they break or melt, yet, this is a positive thing. This must happen. The tomato doesn’t refuse to mix with the oil neither the garlic refuses to be joined with the carrot.  

Love doesn’t work because people don’t allow it to enter. It was only necessary a small gap... However, people cover all the gaps with steel; it’s impossible to reach them... So, as we continue to love them and making everything we can to see them well, they have a defensive response... they attack! And each time they attack, we stay weaker. Therefore, it will come the time when we have to leave them because we no longer can fight against them (and we continue our lives without them) or we have to quit our life. I can’t tell you which one is more painful... 
But... Are they happier hurting us?

A few months back, I was speaking with a person who treated me like “shit”, literally. He made me feel so unhappy that unhappiness is a small word to describe what I felt. So, I let him finish and then I asked:”Why are you like this, always hurting people? Are you happier with my unhappiness? I really hope you are". He gave me one word answer “No”! So, what did you gain by it? I asked... 

The thing is more complicated than it seems, nevertheless I will try to explain the best way I can, based on everything I saw, lived and see. Making other people unhappy does not make anyone happy, even if you think it does. Some people admit it easily, others not even if you are ready to pull the trigger! Do you truly think they don’t know that every time they screw others’ lives, they become even bitterer? They know, but their pride or their stubbornness is bigger than the universe. Do you know why children are so happy? They forgive easily; they forget the fights quickly, because they know they can’t be happy (or live) acting like this. So they free themselves from everything that is negative and enjoy their lives. 

Life only makes sense with love; happiness lies in love. Love brings harmony; the balance we all need. The real water and the real food is love; everything else is just an illusion. Whilst people don’t understand it, they will keep fighting against the only thing that can give them the life they want and will continue dragging themselves, making others' lives miserable and, consequently, theirs. You might not believe me so allow me to ask you something; when you hurt others, purposely or not, does that make you happier?

P.S.1- Nobody can achieve happiness with others’ misery! At least, I don’t know anyone... It’s impossible; we all are links of the same chain... Why can’t people see it? 

P.S.2- Some people seem to repel love and all loving acts. The more people love them, the more they rebel themselves... Something I don't get, do you? 

P.S.3- Do you know what hurts the most? It's not the life we give them (our life); it's to continue living without a life, dragging ourselves, whilst then keep going and make it seem so easy...